I'll Try to Do Better

I didn’t get as much back from my job today as I put into it. It seems that, maybe, I just expect everybody to want things to go well as badly as I do. I was asked in a job interview one time what my biggest obstacle was as a band director. That one was easy. I said “I want to do well more than anything and I have a hard time dealing with the fact that not everybody wants to do well as badly as I do.” I got the job.

So today I felt underpaid. Why? I didn’t make a cent less or more than any other day. Anybody that is a state employee understands that. We don’t get bonuses for good performance nor do we get docked for poor performance. So how was I underpaid? My payment comes from the success of my students. One of my greatest joys in band directing comes from seeing my student’s faces when they achieve something great. Maybe it’s just getting an A on a really hard playing test. Maybe it is when they get their named pulled from the box and they really play it great. Maybe it is winning a competition. All these things help make my job worthwhile. I have to admit that there are somethings that hurt me like seeing disappointment in their faces when they really deserved better. But hey, that’s part of life.

Today I had many things planned to perhaps help us get a better score at lower state. Unfortunately things did not seem to be in place for these things to happen. I have a plan each rehearsal to allow the students to improve. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t. Today it did not. I will try to do better Thursday. Perhaps it is time for me to shut up and let them work it out. I believe I have said it all at this point.